Q: We have quite a predicament in our residence and I’m uncertain which means to go. We have 2 children, ages 15 as well as 11. The 15-year-old has taken to criticizing all her bad actions on her sister considering that she believes we manage her more youthful sister as the preferred. Can this make her act badly? Do you think we should transform just how we manage them?
A: Put 2 or more youngsters in one family members as well as someone will eventually cry “you address him/her far better compared to me!”.
So that brings about the concern, should you take this seriously, and if so, what should you do about it?
First, ask yourself if there is any validity to the complaint. It could be that one youngster is easier to manage compared to the other _ high upkeep vs. low maintenance. You could discuss more interests with one child than another, or one child might behave far better than another. These are all normally taking place scenarios.
Another method to look at it is naturally you manage them in different ways since each of your children matured in different families. Your oldest child has increased up in a family that was raising its first child, nothing else children aware. Your second child was born right into a household with currently broken-in parents and an older sibling.
By definition, you are visiting treat them differently, at the very least to some extent.
One solution below is to schedule dates with each of them on a regular basis. A day would certainly entail one or both moms and dads separately with each kid, spending time together just having fun and also focused on each child.
One more method is to not allow your little girl to use this as a way to manipulate you. If you do, you have provided her an effective and handy piece of leverage.
The bottom line is this: Even if you do address your children in different ways, it remains your older daughter’s responsibility to learn how to manage herself in situations that might be unfair, because that’s good training for the real world, and to behave in the manner that you have taught her is appropriate. In shorts, don’t decrease your criteria for behavior despite “you manage her different compared to me!”.